A Young Girl

A precious, bright-eyed eight year old girl with chestnut brown hair sat quietly towards the back of the small white framed country church.  Her childhood had been good as it was filled with loving Christian parents and an adventurous baby brother.  She often witnessed her parents living the faith that they professed as much as they discussed it in their home.  The love they shared was special.... rare. 

That night, in the white framed church, the girl was a guest visiting for a revival meeting that was taking place.  The speaker spoke in a heavy Scottish dialect and the girl was enchanted by the musical tones and reflections.  It sounded like music to her ears.  Slowly through the message that was a tug- pull-strange feeling stirring inside her.... it felt so much deeper than she could describe.  A sadness, a realization of just how ugly many of her actions, words, and thoughts have been.  As the invitation song began to play, her fingers clung tightly to the back of the pew in front of her.  Everything in her wanted to run-- run to the front of that small church and cry for relief from the internal battle waging inside her.  Fear arose.  She didn't know these faces and what would her mother and father think?  She clung tight to the pew lest she lose her resolve. 

As the service concluded, she wanted to leave as quickly as possible to get home and ask her mother about the unexpected heartache within.  Silence in anxious thoughts filled the short drive home and as she prepared for bed.  Finally, as she couldn't contain the questions any longer, she met her mother in the kitchen saying, "I think God is speaking to my heart...."  and tears fell from both sets of eyes.  The mother spent a great deal of time that evening speaking the words of salvation to her precious daughter.  The next night with both her parents beside her the young girl she spoke of her sinful will to the Savior and asked Him to take over her life and give her a new purpose and meaning.  He did.

Years passed as the girl matured and grew- physically and spiritually.  She entered college and new opportunities presented themselves.  Was her faith something she wanted to carry into adulthood?  She saw her parents adult faith- was that what she wanted?  Influences abounded pulling her to question, but in the end she fell at the feet of her Savior.  She fell in love with Him- passionately in love with the one who had died for her and she has carried no regrets.  His love has carried her through countless trials, fears, failures, and challenges.  His love has taught her to love.  His love has transformed her view of the world, her values, her longings, and her hopes. 

The relationship that started when she was a child that grew into an all encompassing devotion in college has transformed this life..... my life.  You see, I can't help but cry out about what God has done for me!  This is my story, but what about yours?  How did God capture your heart?  My friend, sometimes we just need to remember where we were to see most clearly where we are. 

Silent Lessons

Silence. You either love it or hate it. Sometimes, your response is dependent on the stage of life you are walking through at a given time. I love my crazy (and sometimes loud) family life. I realize that the volume of our house means that it is full of life and activity. Dirty dishes being washed in the dishwasher means that we were blessed with a full table and matching stomachs. The washer spinning the clothes loudly and dryer running at top speed indicates we have plenty of clothes to wear. We are blessed. I hear the blessings in my world and I have to overflow my praise and thanks to the Father from my heart for all that He gives and provides.

Still... There are times when my soul, mind, and heart need a little silence. Time to sit in the quiet of still house and just listen. Listen to the words of my Father. Listen to praise flowing from the lips of fellow believers- speaking the words of my reflective heart. Listen to the response of my Savior as I plead my desperate cries to His loving ears. Silence.

In the past several days God has just had me be still and silent. Listening, crying, praising, praying and above all else seeking.... Seeking His words . Seeking His peace and overflowing love. Seeking what He needed to teach me. I did not feel as though I was to write or express words in the last days, but to just seek.

Many revelations regarding our relationship became clear and I see how I have grown closer to my children and husband in the days of just learning and listening. It seems that when I draw closer to the Father, all my other relationships improve as well- perhaps because my love for my family becomes an outpouring of the love I have for Christ and not something I am attempting from my own strength.

How do you feel about silence? Do you despise it and just fill your every waking moment with activity and chaos? Is this because you have hurts and needs that linger to close to the surface? Do you long for some silence in your world, but haven't carved it out for yourself?

My friend, sometimes a thirsty soul just needs to take a long quiet drink of renewal and refreshment from the Father. Such moments of healing and teaching can best be heard in the silence of His heart speaking to yours. Can you hear Him?

Seasons of Parenting

The season of fall is coming near.  The air becomes crisp and cool and new, brillant colors begin to dot our landscape.  I become inspired during this time of year to bake, decorate and focus more on our family.  I love fall- there is just something about this time of year that stirs my soul.

Our oldest son is entering the fall of his time with us.  He is growing maturing and nearing the age when he will be on his own.  His perspectives and thoughts are as refreshing as the crisp, cool air outside and his dreams are as beautiful as the rainbow of colors on the horizon.  He, too, inspires me to make the most of our time together as I realize just how fleeting the moments are that we have left as a complete and whole family. 

Recently, he asked if he could go and visit with some of the kids on our street as he has been burdened and praying for them.  I felt such a since of pride at this young man who truly has a calling to minister and share God's truth with others.  I also felt shame at my immediate fears- what will their parents' think?  Why can't I be that bold in sharing my faith?

To be honest, this summer has been rough for Caleb.  He is struggling to find his place as he wants to be a teenager but also still longs for childhood.  He wants to fit in with his world, but this is quite a challenge as he is incredibly small for his age.  We have prayed, talked and cried with him and for him many times this summer.  I know just this is just part of the journey- just as the fall leaves must go through hard seasons to develop the most brilliant colors.

I am learning and growing in this area of parenting. I want to savor all the different seasons with each of my sons realizing that the seasons change so quickly.

Strong Tower

Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed by needs.  Needs of this world that seems to turn it's back on our precious Savior.  Needs of my family that are a constant- even just the daily tasks become exhausting at times- laundry, meals, correction of children, and such.  Needs of others that burden my heart to tears.  I think most of us find ourselves in the midst of needs..... the goal becomes contentment, peace, trust and provision.

Where do you run when you find yourself in a state of need?  Where do you find shelter?

"The name of the Lord is a strong tower; The righteous run to it and are safe."  Proverbs 18:10

I have often ran in my times of need to the Savior.  He has withdrawn me from the pit of countless struggles and battles, but running to the name of the Lord?  Max Lucado in his book, Grace for the Moment, discusses the names of the Lord.  God is always Jehovah, but He often refers to Himself in the following aspects:

Jehovah-raah- our caring shepherd who gives wisdom.
Jehovah-jireh- our provider for all needs.
Jehovah-shalom-our peace despite all circumstances.
Jehovah-rophe-our healer of all illness: physical, mental, emotional.
Jehovah-nissi- our banner and refuge against attacks from the evil one.

As I thought about these names, I realized that calling on the name of God is like running into the very essence of His character and being.  It is being so encompassed by His absolute character to the point that the struggles of this world cannot affect us.  This brought such a deeper intimacy in prayer time today as I called on the specific name of my Lord for the individual needs that were on my heart.  The wonderful part of God is that He has a name for all needs- His character is complete and all sufficient for any need.  He indeed is a strongtower that is fully capable of saving you from any struggle.  My lips can't help but praise Him!  My heart can't help but long for His love.

Stealing Away

"My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me.”
And my heart responds, “LORD, I am coming.” (Psalm 27:8 NLT)

Some mornings I awake with such a longing in my soul to steal away in my room some time with my Savior. On those mornings there is a different need than most of my days- more of an urgency to get deep in prayer and scripture. I love those times. It truly feels like Psalm 27:8 in my soul as I feel pulled away from the distractions of my world to just be with Him. The more time I spend with Him, the more time I need with Him. I grow stronger from kneeling in prayer. I accomplish more when I have taken the time to just savor Him. I have more peace when my world is filled with conflict. I sing joyful songs in the midst of sadness and have tremendous joy in the blessings of others.

Simply because His ways are not our ways. He gives life, love, victory and all that is needed for all that He has for us. I want nothing less than Him today, tomorrow, and every day after that. He is my all.

"Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end. "(Ecclesiastes 3:11 NLT)

My friend, is He calling you to spend some moments away with Him today? Run to Him for His calling is richer than the finest of delights. Savor all that He wants to teach and share with you. Delight in His presence!

Praising Jesus

Our church will about once a quarter have a praise and worship service where we just spend an extended time singing to our King as well as times of testimony, scripture reading and extended prayer. I love our Sunday services together, but these services are something so special to my thirsty soul. I think part of it stems from my love of music and how it stirs my heart and soul to awe in my glorious King. Plus, these services reflect the beauty of a church united in praising the Savior they love- hymns and praise songs alike.

Last night when we came home from the service we were trying to eat a quick dinner and get to bed. As I was preparing the dinner, I heard something from the dining room table. I looked over to see my two year old with his hands lifted high singing, "Jesus! Jesus! Jesus!" over and over. I just melted. I was able to catch a few brief moments of it on video.

This brought to my mind the verses our pastor read last night from Psalm 40.

"I waited patiently for the LORD to help me,
and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair,
out of the mud and the mire.
He set my feet on solid ground
and steadied me as I walked along. He has given me a new song to sing,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see what he has done and be amazed.
They will put their trust in the LORD. Oh, the joys of those who trust the LORD,
who have no confidence in the proud
or in those who worship idols. O LORD my God, you have performed many wonders for us.
Your plans for us are too numerous to list.
You have no equal.
If I tried to recite all your wonderful deeds,
I would never come to the end of them." (Psalm 40:1-5 NLT)

As I thought through this passage, God has helped me through so many trials and difficult times. Each time He has given me a new song of testimony and praise for His mighty works in my life. I think He is constantly working in us as we walk climb difficult paths to give new spiritual markers of our growth in Him. No matter where we are today, He is still ready to give us a new song to share with the world of who He is and all He has done for us.

I loved that Kendall found a new song last night. He is learning about Jesus and singing of that growing love the only way he knows how. It was simple. It was genuine. It was convicting- do I share what God is doing in my life with others? Do I listen to the fresh, new melody God is growing within my soul? What is He doing in my life right now? What new paths are we traveling lately?

My friend your song can be as simple as Kendall's praise by just crying out to your Savior. Let us ever be aware of what He is doing in our life and how He is growing and maturing our faith. Let us sing- sing a new song- of His works within our mind, heart and soul!!! Let me never stop searching for the new song He wants me to sing...

Perfectly Designed

Today, I sit quietly in a silent house. All my boys are still sound in slumber and Reagan has left for work. I am enjoying some of the cooler weather that has first come into our area signaling that fall is just around the corner. These moments allow me the opportunity to ponder and consider things.

I love my boys. They make me laugh out loud in joy at their humor, thoughts and comments. They, too, can move me to tears and prayers as well. I give so much of myself to their needs, cares, and longings. Often at the end of the day my energy is tapped, my mind exhausted, and my patience has run out. Why have children who require so much? I think we wanted to experience the miracle that happens within when God forms life- to witness the ongoing miracle of God using us to shape these future men of God. Recently, in the midst of a particularly bad day with one of my sons, a friend reminded me that I was designed to be the parent of that child. She encouraged me by stressing that I possessed all that is needed to help him grow into maturity through my perfect Father. What an incredible thought- every child that God gives you was perfectly designed for you just as you were perfectly designed to be his/her mother. God never does anything halfway my friend!

Today, as I read a devotion I thought about why God chose to create man. I think it is so similar to our reasoning for having children- for the joy in the relationship. We are not easy on Him. We sin and rebel against His plans, but when we turn to Him in repentance and praise Him for all that He is and has done for us, we give Him joy. He designed us to remain close to Him. This is for our protection as well as for receiving His blessings in our lives. We were created to have a daily relationship with Him through Christ on order to bring glory and joy to Him. That realization is so humbling and beautiful to me.

He wants fellowship with me- this rebellious soul that too often fails. He wants my thoughts to be His thoughts. My conversation to be sprinkled with love and honor of my Savior. He wants my hand to ever be in His so that no trial, task or need is ever met in my own strength, but through the never ending power He alone possesses. He wants me to want Him- all of Him- daily and moment by moment.

"And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect." (Romans 12:1, 2 NLT)

"You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body
and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,
as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born.
Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
Every moment was laid out
before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.
They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them;
they outnumber the grains of sand!
And when I wake up,
you are still with me!" (Psalm 139:13-18 NLT)

My friend, wherever you are in life you possess all you need for the tasks at hand. You just need to stay close to the Father through your Christ-given relationship. He longs for you to stay close to Him and savor His presence. That gives Him joy and honor and it is your divinely designed calling.